Self-pity...Waiting...

Okay, so it was prom last night. Before, the dance, I had my make over, I felt so very excited, and very pretty. It lasted for a whole hour and it was honestly refreshing wearing make - up on. But then, when I was able to finally arrive in the building for the annual promenade, I was crest fallen when somebody implied that I was too simple and that my long gown wasn't exactly following the motiff, well, screw you, pig. She actually made me feel bad and I almost felt crying on my table. That night was supposed to be the best and memorable night of my life, but in the first order of events during the evening, I was utterly negative.

Not to mention the hurtful feeling I had when the guy I liked actually indirectly-dirctly rejected my feelings. This reminded me fo the guest speaker's words. "look unto the heart of the person you are dancing with. ", I actually thought everything was going to be all right... He asked me to dance, and I asked to dance with him, but, then I half-wished that I shouldn't have asked him, 'cause that was when he... ... Anyway, at least I got to tell him that I want things back to normal after dancing, and we kind of got to talk to each other, so most probably, we'd finally get back to being friends and I could finally move on.

Then, I saw the ladies around me, I felt that I'm not worth being around these such elegant and gentle females. I wished that I got to the bathroom and stay there until the night finally ended, but then Jennie (I love you, Jen) cheered me up, and got me back to my feet, told me words that I forgot, but knew that I needed to hear. And Patricia, for being there, hugging me in endless care and concern. And Denise and Justine, filling me with such wild yet possible dreams, and great hope.... I love them so much, and I treasure them so much. Thank you, guys.

Then there's King, my supposed 'main partner of the night' , thanks to him, I knew totally I wasn't alone, for he and I had a lot in common that night, we both started feeling really down that we felt like wanting to die, then he told me these words I shall NEVER forget...let me translate it. "when you're really feeling depressed and feel like all hope is gone, God knew what to do, he gave a very simple yet wonderful and beautiful miracle to make everything worthwhile..." King, thank you for twirling me when I told you to. Thanks for giving me a shot to be my partner when we were nominated to be Mr. and Ms. Junior last night at Prom.

Then there's Jexter, one of the most wonderful things that has happened to me that night. He was such a gentleman, a great listener, very charming, and just very sweet, and a good friend. He escorted me, and I actually felt pretty flattered when he offered his arm to accompany me and when he asked to dance with me (I got to dance with him, either twice or thrice, I think). I also felt really lucky while we were dancing (when I asked him to dance, not the other way around), he declined to exhange partners with a couple of our classmates dancing, though I accepted when his crush and another guy offered to exchange. Since I knew he liked her, I played cupid with JC so I ended up dancing with him the next second, fully knowing that Jexter deserved to dance with someone he liked to be memorable, besides, it's prom right? However, when I danced with him again, (THIS WAS WHEN I GOT TO DANCE WITH A FEW GUYS, ODDLY RETURNING ONCE AGAIN TO MY CHAIR, WATCHING ALL THE GLOQING FACES), he surprisingly apologized for a while ago, but I shook it off, telling him I didn't mind at all, then I asked him how did it go with his dance with the girl he liked, and he seemed not wanting t talk about her. I asked him if he indeed liked the girl, but he denied... hmmm... great lie Jexter. But then he told me to sing a song we were dancing to for him, I complied, having fun myself. He asked me for the title, and I answered with the title and the singer(TRYING TO GET THE FEELING AGAIN BY CHRISTIAN BAUTISTA), he nodded with the same serious and tad mysterious expression, though I kind of liked it.
Then I got to dance with the young voldemort, telling him (I was hesitant) that we were dancing to one of my favorite songs... "Stolen by Dashboard Confessional", and voldemort, being a known gentleman, tried singing the words with me, then we seperated.....
Jexter returned for me once again, my favorite song was already halfway through, then he suddenly asked me who I wanted to actually dance with from the third year, the year I belong to... I answered him, and he still held that serious expression with a bit of surprise. By the end of the night... ... he was one of the two guys I kissed on the cheek. He was the first guy who gave me a decent turn to dance.

Melben, thank you too. You were one of the guys, along with Jexter, I kissed on the cheek, just because... thanks for the dance... I appreciated it. It was one of the most memorable dances I've had in my whole entire life.

So.... you wanna know what is the miracle? I won something the whole night, something I didn't think possible except dear Ate Justine, (love yah ate) I won a postion, I was Ms. Junior. What a night it turned out to be... I was half amused but totally surprised... pictures you ask? You might want to be patient...
LOL.
p.s. THE FOOD WAS GREAT<>

Passers-by

okay... so today is my prom... I'm about to eat, and then take a shower. (rolls eyes) For the first time, a whole situation I'm supposed to get nervous or excited... I'm not. Isn't that just weird? Plus Brad had some damn scissors and cut up the cover of my poaoperback book... I HATE BRAD! HE PRACTICALLY SLASHED MY HARRY POTTER BOOK! DAMN HIM! ...for now.

Anyway, right, prom. I'm going to bring lip gloss, perfume, powder, money and a brush... not to forget my PWT's cd, EVERY SECOND COUNTS -deluxe edition (smiles). Oh yeah, and my invitation. (glances bemusedly) Yeah, the dare, blah blah, I guess I could care less about that. If he doesn't ask first, guess I'll have to ask... Psh, as if that'll happen. Too cowardly for that. (winces) so, I'll be posting pictures soon... of me. in the prom. in my gown, in make-up. Big deal? nah.

Oh yeah, they're going to be serving roast beef... I wonder if mashed potatoes and gravy's going to be there? WEll, one thing's for sure, I'm looking REALLY FORWARD TO THE FOOD. Just great, I'm hungry. Plus, I hope I'll go to the coffee shop right after prom, on midnight to two. Plus, I'd like to dance with ms. junior (winks at pats) and my ever good friend jennie (winks). Damn, I'm hungry.

Oh yeah, news flash, these days, me and Voldemort-- the younger one, have been bumping into each other lately, though I try not to acknowledge that, but since I have no pride left, I'll let it go. Seriously, I will, don't worry. It is aprroximately 11:50 AM. I'll take a bath at 12 pm.
Okay, gotta go, I'm really hungry.

I promise to upload some pics... I promise.

P.S. did I mention that I just love Go Fish and Uno cards? (winks at El Segundo and El Desperado)